Ride Report: Inside the surreal world of the Gumball 3000

I'm making my way through parc fermé, with a Dodge Hellcat to my left and a Lamborghini Aventador to my right. In front of me, two Russians are handing a breathalyzer back and forth, trying to figure out who's more eligible to drive. This is the Gumball 3000, and I'm here on a motorcycle. For the uninitiated, the Gumball 3000 is a non-competitive (yeah, right) rally, aimed at wealthy folk in supercars. It has everything you can imagine: cars you'll never own, stars you'll never meet, people with more money than sense and massive parties. Everything, that is, except motorcycles....